Thursday 30 May 2013

Arrested at the Airport !!

A phone call from Curly Bob trashed any hope I had of a quiet night’s painting. Apparently he had arrived back in the U.K. but was stopped at the airport by H.M. Customs who asked to look inside his numerous bags.  Bob has been enjoying his celebrity status a bit too much of late because he demanded to know if the Customs official knew who he was dealing with. The official (obviously an ill informed moron) did not.

Bob then proceeded to throw a bear sized wobbler and berate all the staff leading to his prompt arrest. He was thrown into pokey to cool off. He was grilled for several hours as to why his luggage contained 50kg of Yucatan honey which they believed was being smuggled into the country. Bob’s story that the honey was for his personal use(quite true as he never shares anything with anyone apart from colds etc.) was not believed.

He related his adventures and showed them his mangled ear. However,  as previously mentioned, the surgery had been so good that the wound was invisible. Then to Bob’s horror he was dragged to the X-Ray machine and put through it to see if he was smuggling any diamonds or precious stones. (He is now convinced all his fur will fall out and he will glow in the dark!)

The final indignity was a full strip body search. (For the sake of our younger and readers of a more delicate disposition, we shall not go into any further details). I eventually managed to secure his release in the early hours of the morning. I gave my word to guarantee  his future good  conduct and thankfully all charges have been dropped. Sadly H.M. Customs decided to confiscate his luggage pending payment of outstanding import duty.

Bob was adamant the duty must be paid and ordered me into the studio, bleary eyed,  to produce something to sell so he can reclaim his honey.   His GPB (Doctor for bears) has ordered a week of complete rest which should give me some quiet time to do some painting.

Despite the affront to his dignity Bob Bob has not lost sight of his mission in life.  As I passed his bedroom door there was a notice pinned to it directing me to publish  these 2 oils on canvas titled;-

castleriggstonecircle “Castlerigg Stone Circle”
and;”Cliifs at Etretat , (after Monet) “                               cliffsatetretat

A business meeting is planned  for the start of next week, after Bob has made a full recovery.

Regards


Vanbear 7

pp Curly Bob

Wednesday 15 May 2013

Outrageous Allegations

News has reached Curly Bob’s Press Office (i.e.me), with allegations Curly Bob was not bearnapped at all. These cowardly vermin claim Bob’s hostage situation in the Yucatan was staged to enhance Bob’s standing on the world stage.
Furthermore they claim that the ransom of 100kgs of honey, chocolate and ice cream was actually split between Curly Bob and Las Patas Negras (The Black Paws).
Now I’m not saying Bob is camera shy or shuns publicity. To be fair you can’t keep him away from a camera and/or microphone. However that is a far cry from staging a dangerous publicity stunt to exploit the sympathy and goodwill of bear lovers everywhere.
Curly Bob is a bear of good character who has dedicated his life to promoting my artistic career. He receives no salary or commission apart from the gift of the odd pot(s) of honey or bar(s) of chocolate from gallery owners.
This is quite a common practice in the art world to secure the exhibition of a newly discovered artist. However absolutely no money ever crosses his paws.
Bob considers the allegations to be motivated by the envy of other bears. This is not helped by his fame and more to the point his consumption of copious quantities of honey etc.
He has resolved to clear his name as soon as he is back in the U.K.
Meanwhile it is business as usual with the publishing of
“Barn, Andalucia” barnandalucia and;
beachsceneportugal
“Beach Scene, Portugal”
both of which are oils on canvas.
Vanbear7
pp Curly Bob

Friday 3 May 2013

Back at Work!

Curly Bob has been discharged from hospital and has resumed his business course in Acapulco.

Thanks to the miracle of modern science Bob’s ear has now been restored and it is impossible to see the stitching. Bob gave a press conference as he was leaving hospital. Amazingly he bears(no pun intended) no bad feelings toward his captors. However he thought  their keeping his customised designer sunglasses was a bit of a liberty. A leading manufacturer of designer sunglasses kindly donated a customised pair to protect Bob’s eyes from bright sunshine and flash photography. They wish to remain anonymous which is typical of the generosity directed towards  this amazing bear.

                                                                                                 bob acapulco sml

As you will see from the press photo he looks remarkably well apart from his weight increasing by a few grams.

His fur was bright and clean. Apparently he was offered  a trip to the dry cleaners plus steam cleaning or a bed bath. Personally I believe the said bed bath offered by two young and very attractive nurses decided the issue without much deliberation on Bob’s part.

He has become something of a celebrity throughout Mexico and beyond. I expect Bob will use his newly found fame to promote my activities and his management enterprise even further. To that end he has told me to publish the following works from the archive. (His Ipad is now working again so expect more posts in the future.)

The first is an abstract called “Bush Fire” which is an oil on canvas

bushfire

followed by

cabanondanslesalpilles

“Cabanon Dans Les Alpilles”, an oil on canvas painted from one of Bob’s photos on his 2012 visit to Provence. It is an area Bob loves not  least for the abundant supplies of honey, ice cream, candied fruit , copious quantities of cheap wine and beer which he claims all help  the creative process for an aspiring artist.

Hopefully Bob will be back in Old Blighty by the end of next week. A business strategy meeting is planned on his return.

Vanbear7

pp Curly Bob